misi hujung minggu #2

syg, you tgh practice jd pengantin ke? :)

mr camera man, i love you:)

here goes the bridegroom~ ahmad tarmidzi bin hj jamahin.

yeay mizi sudah kahwin! congrats cousin! we're both born in the same year and usually its me who beats him in every examination.hoh.but now he beat me up 4 months ahead in marriage:) ~haha.its ok.anyway congrats for both of you mizi & azwa. may allah bless you always and live happily ever after!

right and responsibilities of marriage by Hamza Yusuf

resource from here
as a reminder to us

Husband’s rights over wife:

1 Wife to not wear strong scents and revealing clothes, and carry a soft voice in front of other men
2 Wife to protect man's property and her chastity at all times
3 Wife to breastfeed child if asked by husband (at least one year, up to 2 yrs) -many benefits to breastfeeding
4 Wife must treat husband's relatives with respect
5 Child takes Husband's last name and religion (sign of lineage)
6 Wife not to associate with anyone husband does not approve of
7 Wife not to display outrageous behavior

Note: Husband has right over wife with what Allah has allowed. If she does not listen she is being disobedient to Allah, his Messenger (SAW) and her husband. When this occurs, Husband can first abandon their bed (not sleep with her) and if that doesn't work then he can very lightly hit her (no outward bruises or marks can appear). This is controversial in Islam and ther are differing hadiths and opinions on hitting: 1) Not permissible to hit wife at all 2) Husband can hit lightly 3) Man can hit but best are those that do not. Regardless, physical abuse is never allowed. Women also have right to hit when husband transgresses her rights. Once wife no longer transgresses, husband must clothe her with kindness and support her. Material maintenance of wife is not a right when she is disobedient.



Wife's rights over husband:

1 Wife once married does not have to move where husband is if:
- Dowry not given
- She is in danger of being hurt by husband
- There is danger for her safety
- She cannot remain in (phone) contact with her family (dad/mom/siblings).
2 Husband has to give it, if not wife can demand it based on religious grounds. Her request for wanting it does not reflect on the wife’s modesty, as it is her haqq.
3 Husband has to give it to wife at least every 4th day.
4 Husband must:
- Feed wife (provide palatable food according to her socio-economic status - husband cannot be miser with food)
- Clothe wife (according to her socio-economic status, but husband is not obliged to pay for ornamental clothes)
- Provide cosmetics for wife to maintain her beauty (henna, dye, makeup)
- Provide housing to wife
- Provide domestic help
- Provide appliances for maintaining house (but accordingly; a woman in the desert of Africa may not expect a washer/dryer whereas a woman in Silicon Valley would).
- Husband must cover cost of midwife and delivery of children
- Husband is not bound to maintain wife until marriage has been consummated.
6 Husband must hold a Walima and provide food.
7 Wife to be given her own private space.
8 If prior to marriage husband did not mention wife would live with his relatives or wife didn't agree to do so, wife can demand to not live with husband's family after marriage. Also, if woman has 2 of the 3 qualities of beauty, wealth and status/lineage, she can demand to not live with her in-laws, as they will get in her private life (which she probably wasn't used to before). But, only if husband is able to afford it.
9 If harm can be shown to wife, she has right to her own place.
10 Husband cannot prevent wife from visiting her parents - even if parents are non-Muslim.
11 Wife can stipulate before marriage she wants husband to have no additional wives.
12 If more than one wife, husband must treat each equally. If marriage to 2nd wife hurts 1st wife, she can divorce.
13 Wife can/should retain her last name or family name (for lineage identification purposes)

Note: if marriage has been consummated, wife must be taken care of if 2 conditions are met:
1) Husband is financially capable (wife can divorce husband if he becomes poor, but she can relinquish this right. Similar to a loan, when you are receiving payment for a loan and if borrower comes across hard time, you may allow them time to recover and make payments at a later time)
2) Wife fulfills her legally binding responsibilities to husband as outlined above.


Husband and Wife's rights over each another:

1 Maintain hygiene: clean mouth, wear perfume/cologne, and remove underarm and pubic hair.
2 When performing the act, should disrobe.
3 Should suck each other's tongue (yes, a sunnah).
4 Should pray 2 rakat against shaitan before engaging in the act. If have offspring as a result offspring will be protected.
5 Husband should take into account wife's modesty; give her time to feel comfortable being with him.
6 Entire body can be used for pleasure, except rectum of both male/female (strictly forbidden).
7 With regards to inheritance (outlined in Quran): husband inherits 1/2 of wife's shares if no child, 1/4 if a child. Wife inherits 1/4 if no child, 1/8 if a child. If have a Jewish or Christian spouse, no inheritance is given/received between spouses (husband and wife). A Muslim cannot inherit money from a non-Muslim spouse and vice-versa. Other contracts of loans, etc are allowed between muslim/non-muslim spouses.
8 Both must speak gently to each other, no verbal abuse allowed.
9 Both have right to having a child, one cannot use contraceptives/birth control against the other to prevent having children.

tips bertandang

syg asked me to do review on this issue, the do and donts things when we are at in laws house. i google up and find some interesting tips regarding this matter. owh and syg personally give me the tips:)

"org baru nak belajar kenal family baru. cuma kena ringan tulang je. tolong2 kemas dapur, kemas2 rumah, jaga hubby and family.biasa2 je. kalau buatkan apa2, kena buatkan utk semua org jugak. contoh buat air, bukan buat utk cuk seorang je. angkat baju, jemur or gosok baju, bikan baju kita je. tapi untuk semua.memang penat.tapi best ar"

and this tips i find while googling up resource by ustaz ahmad shukri yusof.
sebaik sahaja selesai diijab kabul, secara rasmi kita menjadi miliknya.Kalau dulu hanya sebagai kekasih, tetapi kini sebagai suami/isteri yang sah. Namun kita sebenarnya bukanlah hanya berkahwin dengan dirinya, bahkan juga seluruh anggota keluarganya.

Bagi yang sudah biasa bertemu dengan mertua sebelum berkahwin, tentu tidak menjadi soal. Bagaimana bagi yang tidak pernah bertentang mata dengan keluarga mertua? Pasti diselubungi rasa bimbang, apatah lagi bila memikirkan cara untuk menyesuaikan diri dengan mertua.Bagi menangani masalah tersebut, pastikan anda menyiapkan diri dengan beberapa tips yang diberikan. Persediaan diri sebenarnya bukan hanya bermula selepas sah bergelar suami/isteri, seeloknya sedari awal pertunangan lagi. Kalau kena gaya dan caranya, tidak mustahil anda akan jadi menantu kesayangan.

1. Sebaik sahaja anda sah sebagai tunangannya, mulakan berkenal kenalan dengan keluarga mertua. Andai tinggal berjauhan, hubungilah mereka melalui telefon sekadar untuk bertanya khabar. Jika duduk berhampiran, cuba sesekali luangkan waktu berkunjung ke rumahnya.

2. Ketika berkunjung, bawalah buah tangan bersama. Sekurang-kurangnya dengan membawa kuih ataupun buah-buahan. Tetapi lebih elok jika anda membawa sesuatu yang boleh dibuat cenderahati. Misalnya dengan memberikan sepasang kain sebagai tanda kenangan.

3. Kenali sikap sebenar mertua anda. Tanya kepada pasangan anda, apa yang disukai dan dibenci oleh mertua. Jika anda tahu apa yang disukai dan dibenci, secara tidak langsung ini boleh memberikan persediaan ketika sudah menjadi ahli keluarganya kelak.

4. Setelah berkahwin, jangan sesekali anda memarahi anaknya dihadapan mereka. Keadaan ini memberikan gambaran sebenar sikap anda terhadap anak mereka. Situasi ini mungkin akan menimbulkan kebencian dihati mertua.

5. Setiap kali bertandang, cuba mengambil hatinya dengan bercerita tentang pengalaman lucu yang boleh menghiburkan hatinya. Jangan lupa bercerita dengan sepenuh perhatian agar dia tidak rasa jemu. Ingat, jangan pula anda bercerita sesuatu yang dianggap bodoh dan boleh memalukan diri sendiri.

6. Berkongsi minat dengannya. Kalau dia gemar bercucuk tanam, anda juga harus belajar bercucuk tanam. Kalau dia gemar memasak, tidak salah anda cuba belajar memasak daripadanya. Tunjukkan yang diri anda betul-betul berminat dengan apa yang disukai. Bagaimanapun anda dinasihatkan jangan belajar sambil lewa kerana mungkin dia beranggapan anda tidak serius.

7. Apabila tiba hari-hari penting seperti ketibaan Hari Ibu, Ulang Tahun Perkahwinan, Hari Bapa dan Hari Lahir, jangan lupa menelefon mengucapkan sesuatu. Lebih baik jika anda berkunjung ke rumahnya dengan membawa hadiah. Atau anda juga boleh membuat kejutan dengan mengadakan majlis untuk mereka.

8. Paling penting, jaga pertuturan anda. Jika sebelum ini anda seorang yang ‘mulut lepas’, anda dinasihatkan agar menjaga pertuturan anda. Kata orang, kerana mulut, badan binasa. Jadi berhati-hati ketika menuturkan sesuatu di hadapan mereka. Jangan sampai menyinggung perasaan keluarga mertua.

9. Setelah selesai majlis kenduri, pastikan anda ringan tulang membantu mengemaskan apa yang patut. Terutamanya jika kenduri dilakukan dengan memasak sendiri. Pasti banyak barang yang patut dibasuh seperti periuk,kuali, gelas atau pinggan mangkuk. Walaupun anda keletihan, tetapi cuba sibukkan diri dengan menolong apa yang patut. Tetapi jika majlis dilakukan secara katering, cubalah mengemas apa yang patut di dalam atau luar rumah.

10. Akhir sekali, cuba mengasihani keluarga mertua seperti anda menyayangi keluarga sendiri. Anggaplah mereka sebahagian daripada darah daging sendiri supaya hubungan akan bertambah mesra dan berkekalan hingga ke akhir hayat.Walaupun jika ditakdirkan anda tiada jodoh dengan anak mereka, pastikan anda sentiasa menghubungi sekadar bertanya khabar

misi hujung minggu #1

today, my syg and me settling up some of the things in our things-to-be-done-checklist.owh we also watched '2012' :) interesting movie i must say but towards the ending, the movie seem illogical. how come after the judgement day, still some of the people can survive eh~ oh and also it reminds me of nabi noh and his arc. hola.~anyway thanks Allah for giving us the opportunity to be together and made me enjoying every single minutes spending time with him:) *big grin*.
owh we had choose a name for our house:) villa doi doorsett~hehe syg the one that gave the idea! yes comel kn:)
and not forgotten, there's a lot of crossed in our things to be done checklist :) hoorayy!
many important things has been finalised and setle down!:
+ kursus kawin (settled)
+ ambil borg nikah (settled)
+the date (settled: solemnization-13th march 2010, walimah-14th march 2010, reception-21st march 2010)
+ theme colour (settled: rumah pontian-range of purple, rumah sg buloh: gold)
+wedding package includes the dais, bed, mkn beradap and all the outfit (settled: adli bridal~as requested by mama)
+barang hantaran (half done:cuk's watches, cuk's shoes, cuk's perfume, buu's sutera, buu's perfume, buu's quran and telekung)
+decoration hantaran (sooner to be done)
+phtographer (half done. pre-agreement have been made.gonna meet bakri soon)

yeay suda mau kawen! ~:)

the date

i mean the fixed date for us to remember in our entire life.

the beginning of blessing journey

between encik adam n me as hubby and wife

and alhamdulillah:)

the date has been finalized!

solemnization : 13th march 2010 /27 rabiulawal 1431.

walimah (pontian's side): 14th march 2010/28 rabiulawal 1431.

reception (sg. buloh's side) : 21st march 2010 / 5 rabiul akhir 1431.

syukran jazilaan:)

at the end of year 2009

tittle : Jamuan akhir tahun SMK Ayer Baloi 2009

date : 12 november 2009

time : 1430-1630

venue: dewan balau, kukup golf resort

nothing much to say

the event was a real success

and a happy moment for us.

in 2 years time here.

*yeay*

for more stories, kindly refer to saliza's and kak zaleha's blog :)

happy browsing then

at the lobby of the resort.

sy x de baju boria itu.

masa nk tempah tokey da x mau buatkan lagi stock.

rugi nya.

from left : kak wan fauziah, kak wan zainura, nor nazifa, kak nadia, kak zihan, kak aida, cik mardiana, kak siti zaleha

gambar wjib dgn kembar :P
bakal puan nursaliza binti mohamed salleh

nornaz camwhoring with mantan ketua bidang Sains & Matematik of SMK Ayer Baloi, Pn Khadijah Binti Daud


Geng meja makan:)

nom...nom...nommmm:)

the proportion of nornaz's meals:)
the food were quite nice!

except the fact that the combination of the menu are not that i fond off.

ayam+ikan+daging+udang+sotong.

errkk sunnah rasulallah s.a.w~jangan makan mknanan y berasal dari darat dan makanan yang berasal dari laut serentak. mknan2 ini mengandungi masing-masing ion +ve dan -ve yang akan saling menyahcas apabila bertemu~

hmmm:)

bersama mantan pengetua SMK ayer baloi 2007, Tuan Hj Mohd Zini Bin Abdul Fatah

from left : kak wan, sliza, kak zai, Cikgu Zini, nornaz, ummi salihah

p/s : lepas ini kami mesti merindui puan ummi salihah. da x cukup korum 4 org da..

utk ummi yang akan transfer ke smk gunsanat, tahniah:)

suami ummi, sila jaga ummi baik2 ye.

hehe.

pp/s: oh jgn lupa tinggalkan kunci rmh kulai ye tuan rumah:)

+...while visiting terengganu...+

title: Lawatan kerja dan benchmarking kelas rancangan khas (KRK) negeri johor 2009

Anjuran : Majlis Pengetua sekolah KRK negeri Johor, sektor pengurusan sekolah JPNJ

dan Majlis penyelaras kelas KRK negeri Johor.

date : 07/11/2009-09/11/2009

Venue : Bahagian teknologi pendidikan, Marang Terengganu.

SMK Lembah Bidong, Setiu (LeBEST)

Pasar Payang *wink*

Masjid Kristal Pulau Duyong

SMK Mak Lagam, Kemaman (TESMAL)

sy super duper tripple bertuah dipilih sbg salah seorg wakil penyelaras krk yang terpilih utk mengikuti lawatan kerja dan penanda aras memperkasakan sekolah krk negeri johor. seriously bkn calang2 org yang pergi..pengetua-pengetua kanan sekolah negeri johor, ketua sektor dan pegawai2 JPNJ, serta selected penyelaras krk.heh. termasuk saya. *sila kagum cepat*.

banyak yang saya dapat pelajari daripada lawatan kerja ini. kami didedahkan dgn kaedah dan teknik yang betul dilakukan oleh JPN terengganu dalam memacu terengganu menjadi top no. 1 dalam setiap peperiksaan awam yang dijalankan.

keadaan persekitaran sekolah yang teratur dengan kapasiti pelajar bagi setiap sekolah adalah 800++ (konsep JPNT adalah bina byk sekolah so ratio murid bg setiap sekolah adalah yang paling minimum~heyy brilliant ahh JPN Johor plz take note*) dan di kelas, penempatan murid adalah maksimum 28 bg setiap kelas membolehkan guru memberi perhatian yang lebih kepada pelajar.

so disini ada a few tips yang kami dapat drpd sessi dialog dan perkongsian pintar yang dijalankan :

+ JPN Terengganu/sekolah amat mementingkan ganjaran kepada pelajar. konsep ganjaran bukan lah dalam bentuk rm. tp dalam bentuk motivasi yang amat berkesan~dont worry pengetua.kos murah tp efisien!. bg pljr y cemerlang, pic mereka terpampang di dinding bangunan dgn pencapaian yang diraih dlm setiap peperiksaan. ehh sape x nak pic sendiri ada kt senarai student cemerlang kan. lagi satu, pernah tgk x list name pljr yg dpt perfect score terengganu kua kat paper? *owhhh* ini satu bentuk motivasi ganjaran juga kan:) ~again, JPNJ sila take notes.

+ budaya~di terengganu, guru membuat kelas malam di sekolah-tanpa bantahan. JPNT dlm kenyataannya menyatakan sekolah di terengganu jgn risau. siang malam terang. wahh.bersediakah kita di johor?

+ kerjasama yang erat dgn kerajaan negeri. sekolah mdpat bantuan kewangan dan support yg sgt membantu.cuba cari sekolah mana yg kerajaan negeri johor berikan dua biji bas dan sebuah van utk kemudahan pljr?~heh. belum lagi makmal komputer.damn.

+pamerkan ranking keseluruhan result pelajar, top 10 terbaik keseluruhan dan top 10 terbaik subjek bg setiap m/p pasa papan kenyataan

+kain rentang sbg pledge dibuat oleh pljr yg menambil peperiksaan awam.

+minta ibu bapa beri kata-kata peransang utk anak mereka, dilaminatekan, dan ditampal di dinding kelas

+ program tutor tutee/guru muda

+TOV PMR di terengganu berpandu kepada soalan setara berfotmatkan PMR (juga termasuk subjek tingkatan 3 yg belum dipelajari) based on teori soalan yang dikeluarkan adalah soalan yg akan keluar dlm PMR~by hook or by crook mm pljr perlu bersedia.

so apa yang dy boleh conclude kan disini~pgram2 ini sy pernah lalui sebenarnya.yes sbgai PELAJAR di sm sains muar. haha~adoi.baru perasan.insyallah akan diadaptasi dalam konteks pmbgunan KRK smkab:)

anyway, i enclosed here some of the pics taken during the trip

happy browsing :)

Le BEST - Lembah Bidong Elite School Terengganu

sessi perkongsian pintar with the senior assistant teacher of LeBEST~


and this is the school environment~

camwhoring with newfound friends- puan nurhazline, cik fadilah and cik nornaz

rombongan pengetua2 kanan, ketua sektor sekolah, JPNJ, penyelaras KRK negeri

with kak lin in front of masjid kristal.super duper cantik masjid ini! ~sampai teruja nk jadi org kuala terengganu supaya saya boleh bernikah disini.apakah.

TESMAL- terengganu elite school mak lagam.
souvenier given include a pen written tesmal on it, a goodie bag and also a well printed pamphlet.

pheeeeww~

costly. jgn harap kt johor dpt mcm ni.

comwhoring with the principal of SMK Paduka tuan, Segamat and her husband, The Principal of SMK Dato' Bentara Dalam, Segamat.

kedua2 nya adalah kawan ayah semasa bujang~ hehe.

kami jejak kasih di terengganu:)

before going back home, we took some pic with the principal of TESMAL, Pn Hjh Nong Shamsiah binti Mukhtar Affandi.

her words really inspiring.

excellent is our tradition.

semangat membara, pemikiran juara!

sahsiah cemerlang, TESMAL gemilang

this entry is dedicated to...

both mak ngah & pak ngah

pn zuraidah binti husin & en. zainal abidin bin arshad

and this is my mak ngah:)

during her retirement day

mak ngah and pak ngah will perform their hajj routine starting from today. i wish both of you a blessfull hajj and may all your dream come true dear uncle & aunty..please take care of yourself:)

insyallah dear Allah the almighty bless them in their entire journey of life.

ameen~

p/s: suka tgk muka mak ngah.cantik sgt persis muka arwah tok perempuan:)

regards with lots of love,

ifah.